This is perhaps the most
panic-inducing experience of your uni life. Whether your essay was left until
the last minute by choice, or if the decision was out of your hands (laptops
breaking, essay question release dates being delayed, getting ill, the list
goes on), the result is always pretty much the same for everyone:
1. The
initial panic
You work out how
many hours you have until your essay is due, and then have a minor break down.
2. The
first hurdle
You haven’t even
looked at the essay questions yet. Why haven’t you even looked at the essay
questions yet? You skim through and find one you think fits with the books you
actually had time to read most of.
3. Denial
You write the
title. Time for a break. You’ve earned it.
4. Cry
You really
hadn’t earned it.
5. Get
productive
You skim through
the books and start finding quotes that fit with the question. Things are
looking up; you might just pull this off.
6. Overload
Your brain is
still buzzing from the emotional rollercoaster you just had re-reading the end
of that book. You need a break.
7. Cry
again
Stop taking
breaks. You haven’t earned any breaks!
8. Realising
the time
When did it get
dark? How many hours do I have left? Oh god.
9. Introduction
complete
It’s actually
pretty good too. Even threw in a few academic secondary sources. Celebrate with
a Beyoncé dance to the kitchen.
10. Disappointment
Why is there no
food in the fridge? How are you supposed to be an academic genius on an empty
stomach? Sad dance back to your bedroom.
11. First
paragraph done
Eyes starting to
droop. Wake yourself back up by watching YouTube.
12. Panic
again
Why have you
been watching cat videos for an hour? Stop taking breaks!
13. Inner
turmoil
At this point
you’re not even hungry, you’re just so bored. It’s 5am. All of the shops are
closed, Domino’s just stopped delivering, there’s no food in the fridge. The
only option is the library vending machine. Can you really afford to lose 20
minutes walking to the library and back? Why isn’t there a 24 hour dessert
delivery service?
14. Making
contact
It’s now 6am,
and you’ve miraculously had a productive hour and finished your second
paragraph. You’ve earned your vending machine trip. You message your friends
who are doing an all-nighter in the library and let them know you’re popping
over.
15. Relax
There’s a group
of people in the library all from your course collectively panicking and
emotionally supporting each other through the night whilst consuming enough
chocolate to feed an entire village. You’re not the only one, cool.
16. Realisation
You get back to
your room and realise you look like you’ve slept outside for the past month, in
the dirt. Sexy. Zero shame.
17. Relief
With a few hours
to spare, you somehow scrape together the rest of your essay and write a
conclusion.
18. Panic
You’re
exhausted, stressed, and haven’t had a chance to edit with fresh eyes. Oh god,
oh god, your grades are going to drop. You set an alarm for a 15 minute nap. After
panicking too much to actually sleep, you lie to yourself that it’s fine and
you can edit and print confidently now with a great quality essay.
19. Handing
it in
You arrive to
hand in and see your friends. You all look like zombies. But, if you all look
like zombies, then the standards drop so you all look totally OK.
20. Sleep
Go home, you
survived the night. Swear that you’ll never let yourself go through that again.
Crash until it’s time for your celebratory night out.
As bad as having to write last minute essays are for uni,
it’s nothing compared to a last minute job application. Our tips on writing last minute job applications are an absolute life-saver in case you ever find
yourself in that terrifying position. Good luck!
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