The 10 stages of leaving university

Some students are prepared enough to think about leaving uni before it actually happens. For everyone else, there are some inevitable struggles.

1. Clearing out your room

You haven’t got that much stuff…how bad can it be?

2. Becoming overly sentimental about your belongings

Remember all the free stationery you got at the fresher’s fair? Well, it looks like it didn’t come in handy after all. So why is it so hard to part with that biro collection?

3. Believing that there’s absolutely no way that you’ll have to pay back your library fines

You’ve spent three years racking up library fines with reckless abandon and now you owe significantly more than your overdraft will allow. Surely they won’t make you pay them back now?

4. Actually having to pay off your library fines

The inevitable has happened. You’ve received a threatening final reminder about those fines and it sounds as if a visit from the bailiffs might be imminent. Reluctant to cause a stir among the neighbours, you bite the bullet and go to face the librarians. This is even worse than the time you got caught eating biscuits in the silent study area.

5. Realising there’s no more student discount

You’ve tried to ignore it, but that expiry date on your student card is creeping ever closer and it’s time to accept that you’ll never be able to afford to go shopping again. All the more reason to keep those clothes you were meant to throw away…

6. Facing judgement day…

Oh god. Results. You’ve not been looking forward to this bit. You begin to berate yourself for not working hard enough. You convince yourself that you’re definitely going to fail. You start thinking about all those lectures you missed. Were those nights out really worth it? Will anyone ever employ me? Will I be living with my parents for the rest of my life?

7. …followed by relief

But somehow, miraculously, you’ve made it. You officially have a degree! You can start using social media again without feeling guilty for procrastinating! That is until you realise that everyone you know is posting smug statuses announcing their results and log off in disgust.

8. Graduating

As if the library fines weren’t enough, it turns out that graduation is out to fleece you too. Appalled by the price of gown hire, you begin to consider knocking one up yourself. How hard can it be?

9. Going home

It’s all over. You’ve graduated. You’re living at home again. Your parents won’t leave you alone. Extended family members start interrogating you about your life plans. Moving to a faraway country becomes increasingly tempting, but then you remember that since you’re unemployed you probably can’t afford to go much further than Dover.

10. Starting the job search

The inevitable final stage. Eventually, after weeks of moping around, binge-watching Netflix and googling graduate unemployment statistics, it’s time to sort your life out and start looking for a job. If you can just remember where you saved your CV…

Leaving uni is a daunting prospect, even for the most organised of students. However, you’re not alone! TARGETjobs can help you navigate the unfamiliar territory and create a great graduate CV – even if you haven’t looked at yours in three years. 

Article written by Amie Marshall, TARGETjobs Editorial Intern. Connect with Amie on LinkedIn. 

10 good intentions uni students have at the start of 2nd year… and the reality!

1. ‘Next year is final year. Let's make this a good one.’

When people mention the dreaded g-word (graduation), you start to get emotional. You’ve come to realise that next year is your final year, so you need to make this one the best one yet. This means getting high 2.1s and going out and getting eight hours of sleep every night. Doable?

2. ‘I should really limit the amount of times I go out.’

You no longer have the ‘I’m a fresher’ excuse, so you should really take your degree more seriously and try to make your Friday morning 9am lecture. However you’ve had a tough week and feel like you deserve a trip or two to the pub. You actually end up going out the same amount or more than in your first year. Oops.

3. ‘I will not eat a kebab after every night out. I will definitely not gain my first-year podge back again.’

Everyone warned you about the ‘fresher 15’ due to a lack of sleep, over-eating and over-drinking, but you still became a victim of the dreaded weight gain. After being told by numerous family members that you’ve ‘filled out a bit’ you’ve spent the summer months trying to get rid of your extra layer of 'warmth'. However, you’ve found the Domino's 5am delivery too tempting so it looks like you’ll be warmer than ever come summer.

4. ‘I should do some work; I'll go to the library.’

In first year you never set foot in the library, or only went there to play hide and seek out of sheer boredom on a Tuesday afternoon. However, times have changed. This year counts, so you should probably go there to do some essays and revision. Although you seem to be spending more time in the SU than in the library...it's natural, right?

5. ‘Don’t go shopping; get that assignment done.’

You really try to do more studying, but realise time is running out on getting 10% discount at Topshop and a free McFlurry at McDonald’s. This means it is necessary to go shopping to buy more clothes, followed by lunch out (of course).

6. ‘I will pay the bills on time.’

You have been getting excited all summer about moving out of halls into a house with your friends, and tell yourself you’re determined to remember to pay the bills. The emails and letters demanding money become the bane of your life very quickly. Forgetting your login details and getting threats of your electricity being cut off is a regular occurrence. Welcome to true adulthood.

7. ‘I should really get the washing up liquid out.’

Unlike halls, your house doesn’t have a cleaner. You don’t want to live in a dirty house, but find you have better things to be doing than cleaning. Balancing the dirty plates and bowls on top of each other and seeing how tall the tower can get before crashing down is a challenge, and you’ve become quite the expert.

8. ‘My napping regime is out of hand. It will stop.’

You realise that many adults do not nap. However, the sudden realisation that you’ve only got two more years of not being judged about napping at 11am, after a tough 9am lecture, and then napping again at 5pm ready for your night out is just too much. You need to make the most of it.

9. ‘I will get a job.’

The social side of first year was great. Coming out of first year with a maxed out overdraft was not. Working all summer to pay off your overdraft was really not. You’ve realised that maybe a small part-time job is necessary to avoid this happening again. But then again, you’ve only got two years left so should make the most of uni life.

10. ‘Everyone else has a summer internship. Must get one.’

Much to your dislike, it hits you that the time for applying for graduate schemes/jobs is not far off. You’ve realised you do not want to spend this summer in a mind-numbing retail job, so start applying for internships in an attempt to make this summer more productive. But that one scary thought is a constant in the back of your mind...next summer = graduation (the end of an era)! 

Perhaps not all of your good intentions have worked out, but you did you best! Don't forget that TARGETjobs can help you; maybe not with the washing up, but with getting an internship and graduate job. Take a look at our timetable to make the most of your penultimate year. 

Article written by Charlotte Wharf, TARGETjobs Editorial Intern. Connect with Charlotte on LinkedIn.